Two Thousand and Seven

– MMVII –

Your emotions are deeply embedded in your past. Now it’s time to pick a new destination. You are at the beginning of the next chapter of your life, so observe what’s in front of you and don’t try to navigate by looking in the rear view mirror.

What did you do in 2007 that you’ve never done before?
Walked away from someone I loved deeply and dearly.

Did anyone close to you die?
I wasn’t close to any of them.
But when I heard they were gone I still felt a kind of loss I could not quite place.

What you would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Fitness – mind, body, soul. I want to find the stillness within me, and yet have the courage to stand up for my needs, my rights and myself, despite what I stand to lose.

What date from 2007 will remain etched in your memory and why?
Christmas Day, I gifted myself a little self-respect.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Placing all my belief and faith in the love of another. All of which came to nought. Again.

What was your biggest failure?
Not sticking to my resolution to stay emotionally independent.
And abandoning my gym routine.

On a material level what was the best thing you bought in 2007?
Shoes. Satisfaction guaranteed, within and without.

Where did most of your money go?
To the various airlines that ferried me to and from Bombay.
Month after month after month after month after month.

What song will always remind you of 2007?
The ones she said reminded her of me. I just cannot bear to listen to them now.

Compared to this time last year are you happier or sadder?
Sadder. So much emptier. More alone than ever. But stronger, I guess.

Thinner or Fatter?
I am trying to convince myself that I should be loved no matter what size I am.
(It’s not really working.)

Older or Wiser?
16 emotionally. 26 mentally. 126 physically.

Richer or Poorer?
I have enough by way of means. But it means nothing to me.

What do you wish you’d done more of?
Read. Prayed. Listened. Exercised. Chocolate.

What do you wish you’d done less of?
Believed. And chocolate.

What was your favorite TV program of 2007?
Actually, I don’t remember watching any TV at all.

Who pissed you off in 2007?
The people who hired me to do something other than what I was hired for,
making me feel incompetent and perennially frustrated at work.

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